I have never in my life stod infront of a change as big and with more impact then this.
I'm sitting on my bed, surrounded with candles, since the power as of today offically got turned off, not because we didn't pay the bill, but because as of tomorrow this house will no longer be mine.
When I moved in here, I was horrified of letting go of the passed, to confused to see a future and to affraid to loose my presence to search for my own future and reach my goals struggeling alone.

There is a strong feelig inside of me, and I can not put the right words on what it is, but as always, I will make my best attempt to explain.
This house has so many bad memories, more bad than good ones, but all the roughness that happened since I moved in here have made me a stronger, and better person. Many things with this experiense has been hard, frustrating and heartbreaking.. I'v gone through hell and back many times around at this house, more than ever before, I have fought for what I believe in, just the way my father once thought me to act in situation where everyone is pointing and guiding you in one direction but you gladly run the opposit way.
I made a decission where nobody stod behind me.
I made a decission that was a million times harder then a different path would have been.
But as I'v always known, I think with my heart and not with my brain and because that is the way I work and act, I'm now beyond happiness, because what I believed so strong in, what I thought was right from the moment it started - in the end turned out to be just that.. right.

I'm moving tomorrow, and I'm closing one chapter in my life. What that exactly mean, I'm not sure, I just know that i'm closing one door and I'm blindfolded running towards the next one - knowing that I'm not running there alone.
I'v never before found a place with someone I'm building a future with, moved and creat a home together. I'm excited, terrified but I'm def ready.

There is nothing about this house I'm going to miss, it has been a bad experience in more ways than one, but it brought me the best thing that has ever happened to me and anyone who doesn't approve, support or have anything less than positiv to say, doesn't belong in my life anymore.

I'm inlove, my life is forever going to change tomorrow, I'm happy.. and I believe that is the key word.. through all the struggles we have been through and everything we have worked through.. and you are still the one and only person that can bring sunshine in to my life even when I feel dark and gloomy. You make me feel safe. You make me feel loved. But most of all, you are making me a better person, with you I am someone, I never thought I could be.. a good girlfriend, a good fiance.. and in the future a good wife and a good mother..

words can not describe how happy I am with you or how much I love you..
Our life together as us, is officially starting tomorrow..

Love,
EM.